I want to be thin.
I want to be skinny already. I’m tired of eveybody always telling me how I don’t need to lose weight and I look fine. All my friends have arms that are 7 inches in diameter. Mine are probobly 10+. All of them wear clothes like pretty tanktops, or even tee shirts and they dont have to worry about their belly botton showing or the shirt scrunching and their big white bellies showing because none of them have them. Meanwhile even baggy shirts are too tight on me sometime. I hate when I’m in a dressing room and I hear a slight ripping sound from stretching out the shirt. I have a nice hourglass figure but it’s unoticable due to so much body fat. And my legs. I think I’m like a whale with so much fat hanging and so white. In the summer I can’t even wear a normal bathing suit bottom because I’m so insecure, I have to wear a bathing suit skirt. I also want to get the people who do notice off my back. Not mentioning any names, but they are very close to me. I love them but sometimes I feel pressure to lose weight or to look perfect. I see these girls like Victoria Justice on t.v. wearing the perfect outfits that I, as a big girl, could never wear.
There are some days where I look at my body and I love it. Sometimes I love being big because that’s the only reason I could punch if I need to, and sometimes I just love the way I look. But I wish I was thin so I could..just be better. I want to wear the clothes I want. I want to stop being the slowest of my friends-all my friends. I want to not sit down and feel my stomach bunching up. I want to have the metabolism to be able to eat whatever I want. And I really want to stop comparing myself to all these other girls who are really thin. The worst is that all think they’re fat, and I want to scream at them and tell them what it’s really like to be fat.
Just remember, I do think I’m beautiful, I just want to fix this one thing. And I know I don’t need to be skinny to find the right guy, because I already have the perfect one. I have friends who accept me for who I am and that’s probobly why they dont see it, but they’ll know its there if they open their eyes. I love them, I love me. I just want to be skinny
